Uncertainty

For our Christmas program, the ensemble is singing a song that we've done before.  It's one that is from Mary's perspective...no, not Breath of Heaven.  This one is "Be Born in Me."  It gives us perspective about what Mary must have been feeling and going through as she was approached by a heavenly being and came to acceptance of this unusual "honor."  I'll probably have more to say on this in another post, but something hit me last night.  

One of the phrases from the other song we're doing says, "It was not a silent night.  There was blood on the ground." 

Kim was explaining why we're changing those words...I guess we are censoring the story a bit so that parents can decide when they have that conversation with their kids. But he also pointed out that it could mean blood from giving birth, but it could also mean the blood all around from the killing of the first born sons dictated by King Herod.  

I was thinking about that later and I was struck with the thought that Mary was probably scared of bringing a child into the violence of that world.  Has anything changed?  

I don't have kids, but I've often thought about the daunting task of protecting them, of hoping against all hope that they will make it and not be too messed up by all that goes on in our world.  And I have a feeling that most moms have had the same thoughts and questions...will they be ok?  Will I do a good job taking care of them and keeping them safe, but not smothering them?  Can you imagine what Mary faced? She not only had a first born son, but the Promised One... The Messiah.

Women give birth every day, all around the world in the midst of conflict, war, uncertainty....in clean places, in less than appealing surroundings...surrounded by people they love, or doing it all alone.  And the world stops for a moment when the mother hears her baby's first cry.  And when she looks into the face of that small life, her life is redeemed.  She has done something to redeem the world.  

She has given life to someone else.

And day by day, you let go of that little life.  You learn that, just like giving your life by giving birth to that child, you give life to him or her by letting go.  

Mary let go.  Her whole life was a lesson in the sacrifice. First the sacrifice of her heart and body...then the ultimate lesson in sacrifice that her first-born son ended up making for her and for the entire world.  And she still had to let go.